You are going to the movies! Once you get to the theater, the concession stand instantly calls your name, so you decide to share a large popcorn with your date, intending to only eat part of it. Eating a few handfuls during the previews, you manage to place the bag down on the floor when the movie begins. Yay! You did it!
Then about halfway through the movie, you have a hankering for another couple handfuls. You pick up the bag and start out slow, but somewhere between the crazy action scene and where the two lovers make up, you do a bang-up job of hoovering the rest of the popcorn. Your hands took over as your brain turned off and your innocent “couple handfuls” turned into a thousand calorie nightmare. “How in the hell did that just happen,” you ask yourself as the credits start to roll.
As you put on a happy face for your date, you’re silently reprimanding yourself on the way out to the car. You are dropped off at home and you bake a frozen pizza, because technically you didn’t have dinner. You promise yourself that you’ll only have 2 pieces, but after practically hooking the bag of popcorn around your neck like a feed bag, in the moment you tell yourself, “I’ve already messed up, what’s another piece or so. I’ll start back up tomorrow,” and twenty minutes later, you succeed in polishing off the whole pie. Feeling like the scum of the earth would be an understatement. You slowly walk up to bed, feeling bloated and defeated. While getting undressed you find a small kernel of popcorn in your bra and, without thinking, you throw it in your mouth. Wow, what a splendid way to end the evening.
Next time you go to the movies, keep your wits about you by trying one of these tips…
1) Downsize Me- Order a small popcorn instead of sharing a large. According to the Center for Science in the Public Interest website, AMC Theaters have about 370 calories and 20 grams of saturated fat, while the large weighed in a 1,030 calories with 57 grams of saturated fat! Holy crapoli! Even if you split the large right down the middle, you’d still be consuming 145 more calories than eating a small on your own. And let’s get real, a hungry beastling always eats more that her share.
2) Box and Bowl- If you can’t get over the prices at the concession stand and you opt for splitting the large (since that’s the best deal), ask for the box they use to put multiple items in. Take your share out of the tub and use the box as your own personal “bowl.”
3) Suck it, Popcorn- So you did the box trick, but now you want seconds! Be prepared and bring a couple pieces of hard candy with you (I love me some Jolly Ranchers) so it keeps your mouth occupied for the rest of the flick. Yeah, yeah, Jolly Ranchers have calories as well (about 25 calories per piece), but considering the alternative, I think that’s a no-brainer. If the extra calories in the candy freak you out, there are plenty of tasty sugar-free options out there.
4) BYOS- Bring your own snacks. They say you’re not allowed to bring in any outside food, but I used to do it all the time and I’ve never been caught. Once, I brought a whole Subway sandwich into the theater (not one of my proudest moments) and nobody ever bothered me. Not only was my meal cheaper than the concession stand, it was way healthier too.
5) Broke as a Joke- Buy your tickets online and leave your wallet in the trunk of the car. That way, you just can’t buy a damn thing!